Ordered paella for lunch today and looked forward to sitting out in the sun with some work buddies. I was happily chatting and chomping away until I noticed something very peculiar about my meal. Are those maggots I see? They were just hanging out near the sausage and the mussels, and nowhere else. Pushing the thought away, I took one more bite but as the idea settled in more I felt all of a sudden both nauseous and itchy. To be sure and to get validation I shoved my plate toward my lunch buds and yep, they agreed it had to be MAGGOTS. A few dry heaves and a glass of water later, I was ready to get my money back.

I discreetly brought my plate back to the counter and asked for a refund. Four guys (not sure if any of them was the chef) took turns inspecting the plate and one commented that it did look “suspicious.” No problem on the refund and off I went to pick up something else. This time from the bakery. (Rice pudding – though now that I think about it what made me get rice again? Must be the Asian in me.)

As I was about to pay, one of the food inspectors came over to me with the paella pan to assure me that they were not maggots at all but rather burnt rice. Pretty convincing as all around the edges of the pan were little maggoty rice pieces, nicely burnt and crisp. I felt much better until Jim mentioned that he thought it was just that the maggots were trying to escape the pan but died trying.